Overcomer

"Go on... jump!" the voice gently urged me. It was a night scene and I was standing at the edge of a ledge, opposite an apartment block. A couple of people (one was vaguely familiar) were encouraging me to take the plunge. Oddly enough, I got the feeling that this was not one of a senseless, act of destruction. But there was something more... Suddenly something struck me that I ever stood on this same ledge before. Exactly the same scene! As if reading my thoughts, the person next to me said, "You did it before." and smiled. Yes indeed, with one leap I jumped from the ledge right into the window of the unit directly opposite. I didn't how I did it but I did. The feeling was amazing, I recalled. What strength! What guts!

But it was different now. This time I was urged to jump off and fly! I took a look down and retreated in fright. It looked like a long way down. "Come on, you can do it," the voice comforted. "It's time to overcome your fears." My heart was pounding like crazy as both assisted me by my arms closer to the edge. "You can do this. Now jump!" And so I leapt. As I fell, I opened my arms and wonder of wonders, I felt myself lifted up. I actually find myself flying! The feeling of euphoria swept over me and it was indescribable! I started laughing as I realised I had defeated FEAR. I awoke with a startle and found myself smiling... Though it was just a dream, it was a heartening one as I had looked at fear in its eyes and kicked its butt!

I can imagine why this dream meant so much to me. Fear has a way of bringing people to their knees. I was standing on a 10-metre platform but this time it was not a dream. I was in the navy camp. Countless pairs of eyes were looking at me as I stood at the diving platform to "demonstrate" a proper dive. For some unexplained reasons, fear gripped me and I just could not bring myself to take the leap. Worse still, my very OWN recruits were coaxing me on, shouting words of encouragement. I made the mistake of looking down and suddenly the waters below looked like shark-infested ocean. I felt like throwing up and my knees decided to have fellowship with one another... I came down, tails between my legs, humiliated. Each step down the flight of stairs was painful. I could not even look at my recruits in the eye. It was a terrible feeling. Owing to this experience, I endeavour to overcome fear of heights at every opportunity. When I finally scaled the 10-metre wall during the rock-climbing course, I felt like crying. But this dream of yester-night was like the proverbial leap of faith.

I can do it.



On a separate matter, I dreamt of M... yet again. He looked different though. But still as flirtatious as ever... I wonder how he's doing now since we last parted. Peace, my soul, peace.